More Movie Blogging: Sharknado

Following hot on the heels of yesterday’s movie spectacular “Sharktopus”, now I’m watching the newly released “Sharknado”.  Are you ready?

There’s a shady trade of some type going on, something to do with sharks, but I’m not entirely sure what it is.

It took five and a half minutes for the half naked sunkissed people to show up.  What type of cheesy movie is this?

Acting is ever so slightly better than in Sharktopus.  So far.

Ooo look, the storm has driven away all the sharks in the area.  It must surely be safe to go surfing.

I didn’t know sharks could attack in 3 inches of water.

Lol, knew it wouldn’t be long before someone blamed global warming.

Ooo, shark flying through windows.  Nice.  Luckily there was a handy pool cue for slutty girl #1 to stab it through the head with.

Rofl.  Shove an oxygen canister in a shark’s mouth, then shoot it.  Nice effects.

Look out!  Runaway Ferris wheel!

Sharks on the freeway!

So far this movie is more about flooding that a ‘nado.

And there goes main character #1 – the plucky old drunk.

School bus full of kids that needs saving… of course.

And there’s the ‘nado.  Flying sharks!

Shark landing on the roof of the car.  Not fun.

Lol.  Why is she getting pregnancy tests?!  Now is not the time!

Seriously cops?  There’s a storm dropping sharks all over the place, and you’re going to chase a car for speeding?

They’re gonna take a helicopter?  Are they nuts?

Let’s not just escape to higher ground… let’s throw some homemade propane bombs from a helicopter into a fricking tornado.

Two of these characters have scars – really hideous scars.  It’s like they  deliberately poked and prodded them and infected them.  One guy “fell off a slide” as a kid, and his scar looks like he poured acid on himself.

ROFL.  “We’re gonna need a bigger chopper.”

Few more gory deaths, but I still don’t understand why they’re trying to stop a tornado.  You can’t stop a tornado.

Oh wait, they’re stopping to rescue some old people.  They’ve done kids, they’ve done OAPs… will they manage to fit in some disabled people before the end of the movie?

Isn’t it a freaking miracle that some kid who was actually at flight school, can manage to fly a helicopter steadily right next to a tornado?  I’m pretty sure most pilots wouldn’t get anywhere within 25 miles.

Oo, shark hanging from a helicopter.

Sexy girl dead.  Pilot distraught.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  A falling shark ate the “hero” in one gulp, but luckily he had a chainsaw, and he cut his way out.

Oh, it was the same shark that ate the sexy girl.  Apparently it ate her whole too, and they managed to save her.

And now she’s snogging the pilot, even though she started the movie fancying the “hero”, who happens to be the pilot’s dad.

And the exwife reunites with our “hero” even though she might be pregnant, but it’s not too bad cos her boyfriend got eaten ages ago.

Verdict?  The acting was slightly better, but that somehow makes the movie worse.  It was like they took it seriously.

What’s next?








About Colette Horsburgh

A 30-something creator/baker/writer/doodler/crafter living with several (but not enough) scatty animals.
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